Friday, August 27, 2010

Big Lies!

I often run into the phrase Lie of Homosexuality. Hyperbole is the all the rage for bloggers. The Deception is another phrase used with reckless abandon. The Curse, the Dishonesty and the Lie. Sounds like a Law firm in a L.A. detective novella.

Living the Lie. That’s what they say. Both sides say it, the red and the blue. After I read an essay from either of these extreme fractions I feel as if I should applaud the oration. Such Drama.

The deep blue’s say that our homosexuals have no chance or choice - this is how the Lord made us and therefore is how He intends for us to live. Married and SGAttracted? Dishonesty! You must be not telling the truth to someone. Lies! My viewpoint offends those who believe that I should accept and live out my heaven-given nature. Yet I understand their view.

The scarlet reds often cling to Old Testament fire and brimstone. They gives us anecdotal evidence of people being mistaken in the assumption of SGAttraction, or people being changed into straight and narrow-way-walkers, often using a bible dictionary of adjectives to describe the sinful behaviors. If I don’t claim to be in need of fixing I often offend their sensibilities. Yet I can understand their view too.

Based on what I have experienced and what I have lived, both red and blue extremes seem adolescent. Primitive. Almost naive.

"My expressed experience with SGA seems to offend universally at every turn while gathering little by way of endorsement. This has famously complemented my pretend at disadvantage nicely – as long as I remain a victim. I taped early on into a legitimate power source: The power of being picked on.

The problem is, I quit feeling quite so needy some time ago.

As I am no longer feeling sorry for myself, my power now has to come from a different source. I am not the emotional sponge I was draining energy from friendly apologetics who kindly tried to lighten my Burden in the early days. I now want to shout from the rooftops, or get on face book and announce to the world that I don’t need anyone to feel sorry for me anymore. I don’t need folks finding a place for me at the kiddy table. And certainly I don’t need to be consigned to damnation either.

I get my power much like the die-hard 70’s solar panels still on my father’s house in Idaho. – I am now healthy, and can utilize what energy is needed and then store excess for later. I sometimes find I have sufficient to share with someone else.

Who would have thunk?

About the time GW Bush was utilizing malapropisms, I was letting go of a few preconceived ideas about myself, Short time later, and I dropped my treasured injured party status. I become a player instead of a casualty. Toss me the Ball – I have been on the sidelines complaining for long enough.

I am fervent and steadfast in my belief that my father in heaven wishes me, regardless of my sexuality, to live in a commuted monogamous relationship with my wife.

That others wish to express themselves differently does not affront me. Nor does it prod me to change what I know. Speechifying Reds and Blues send me their cards of symphony for my way-worded ways. I read the lovely poetry and then use them to line my cat box.

The Big Lie! The Deception!

Truly, these nay Sayers are not in a position to know what is between me, the Lord and my partner. It's time to effectively eliminate any effort-putting into stock of what these others think concerning my sexual attraction or its cause. I will disarm their opinions here by not
referring to them anymore.

As far as the any dishonesty involved? That is easily solved.

Tell the truth.

As a Mormon man, a father and husband and as someone that deals with SGA, lying cannot be any longer a part of my life.

For those who are concerned with the Big Lie of Homosexuality.

Just tell ‘em the truth.

Friday, August 6, 2010

See Here

Seeing is believing.

Or is it that believing is seeing? It all depends on where you sit. Or stand.

If faith precedes the miracle - as testified by one of my superheros, SWK, then what is the miracle I am waiting for? What am I believing in, and how do I show my faith in it?

I was an invisible kid in the eighty's. I saw no one around that was like me. I spoke to no one about my homosexuality. I cried and pleaded, I panicked and freaked out -before I knew what freaking out meant. And I did all of this in a closet before I understood the connotation.

I don’t want other children to have to do the same; to have to cry in some closet because they think that they are unworthy of love or acknowledgement.

I want responsible dialogues established, I want someone to announce at the dinner table, “Hey family, I think I might be gay.” And then I would like the first thing said to be “Please pass the potatoes.”

Sound of potatoes being passed.

“Now, what were you saying?”

I want love and understanding. I want kindness and appreciation shown. I want every child of god to know all about his linage and therefore his power, and his worth.

All children of heavenly father should expect to treat each other with civility and kindness and then do the same to others. If respect is something that is earned, the least we can do is start off at neutral. I don’t need to be treated as your brother.

Yet. I will probably have to earn that. But I would like to be treated as a friend until I prove differently.

That is what I believe. All people deserve kindness. As for what I will do to show my faith? Faith moves us to action. So, how will I choose to move?

I will show my faith by being aggressively kind to those I do not agree with. I will be vocally demonstrative and appreciative. And grateful. I choose to believe that I can help to change perspectives within my lifetime - that unless I am hit by a truck tomorrow or spontaneously combust this afternoon, what I say and do in my life will be a force for good.

If I am the only Homosexual you know (Hi. How are you? I’m Calvin Thompson, a four generation member of the LDS church) then I will be the best one you know.

Oh, I know Cal, too! Oh, yeah… He’s a good one”

The path to reconciliation will be much rougher and longer if we meat halfway at some point. I am going to run out to the halfway marker, and I might go further. Then we can converse like people. Our conversations can start out like “Hey cousin Merrill, nice shirt.” Or "Gee Alfred, I thought you were dead.” Just like every other family gathering.