Monday, March 2, 2015

If you can't stand the heat get out of the glass house

You are wrong to ______.  I do not support you.  However, you can believe whatever you like. It's a free country.

I get that all the time. It is true, I get it because I put my thoughts "out there" as far as posting a gay Mormon blog and links to it on Facebook.  I knew from the start that my POV would be considered odd, and that has proven to be true. Conservatives think I am a heathen for being gay, and liberals think I am a loon for choosing to marry a woman.  
  • Being gay is wrong
  • Being married to a woman is wrong.  
  • Being gay and being married to a woman is wrong
  • Being gay and married to a woman and being public (blog or Facebook) is wrong.
  • Being Mormon is wrong. Blind obedience is wrong. Paying tithing is wrong. Brown shoes with a black belt is wrong.  Never mind that last one.
Let me answer those questions by saying...  blah, blah, blaaah. 

If I were to tell one of my friends that he can choose to do as he believed however wrong he was, but that I supported him in his choice -- would that be offensive?

What if I said "you are wrong to want to marry someone of your own gender." How would that fly? Or, what if I said "You are wrong to have sex with one of your same gender". There would be screaming.

How you choose to live your life is wrong. That sentence would cause a riot, and yet, somehow, how I chosen to live my life is "like"able or not on Facebook.

(For liberals, these neigh say-ers sure are being conservative.)

So, today's soapbox topic would be this, were I to have to stick a point on the post. It is not my position to judge others and the choices they have made or that they are making. By the same token, others are not in a position to judge me and the life decisions I have made or that I am now making. 

And as I type that last sentence, reality kicks in and I have to laugh at myself. The glass house I live in gives people a pretty decent view. And if, by some miracle, they didn't get a chance to see it all, I go and announce it from the rooftops. "Shout it out" as it were. And then I ask for feedback.

Bottom line is that I have chosen to put my "stuff" out there for others in my position to read, and in trying to find those who need this kind of a read, I have opened up my life to comment. 

Some of the comments are painful. Some are wonderful. Regardless, I do not need comments in order to support or justify my stance. I strive to do what the Lord has asked of me, Calvin Thompson. 

All I can say is that I hope that you strive to do what He has asked of you.

When I started posting in 2009 there wasn't so much out there for those who were gay and wanted to live according to the LDS churches standards. Now there is even less out there. Being gay and being an active card-carrying Latter-day Saint seem to be incompatible. Most choose to live quietly with their thoughts.

I made another choice.  Let's see how long I can take the heat.  


  1. If marrying a woman works for you, I am genuinely happy for you. I really am (as long as you both went into the marriage fully aware that it was a mixed orientation marriage.) But for the vast majority of us this is neither a viable nor a realistic option. At the same time, I know LDS gay men who are in same-sex marriages, and who very strongly feel that the Holy Ghost has told them they are doing the right thing and God does not condemn them (regardless of what the "Church" says). If they strongly believe that this is what God has asked of them, who am I oppose that? Same for your situation - if you strongly believe that a mixed orientation marriage is what God has asked of you, more power to you. I am not throwing any stones. But I do believe that there are other "moral" options for gay LDS people besides life-long celibacy or mixed orientation marriage. In the end, all one can do is follow the path that one feels called to follow.

    1. I absolutely agree. I believe it is about personal revelation. What a timely thought. May I use your comment to help express this?

  2. Calvin, I do have one thought I would like to express and do so with kind of a question. If I understand correctly, Calvin is not your real name. So, even though you are putting your stuff out there, which I believe is important and I bet it has helped many people. Because of your anonymity - is your glass house truly a glass house?

  3. Hmmm, do you really believe it is simply about personal revelation? Are gay Mormons living a gay life going to get into the Celestial Kingdom, in your opinion? Let us move beyond 'that's up to God' and get an answer please if possible.
    Also, I would love to hear from your wife - we've heard your side and your pride in being a gay Mormon man being married to a woman - but I would enjoy hearing your wife's perspective on being married to you - not the perspective she thinks she should write, but her genuine feelings and struggles. Nice that you'll 'die trying' but it would also be nice to hear from her.