Friday, March 26, 2010

I am writing a book concerning a subject dear to my heart: The experimentation with Fresnel diffraction and specular reflection of neutral atoms in the confirmation of the de Broglie hypothesis.

Okay. It's about Gay Mormons. Surprise.

I am writing with a friend of mine who has her own unique perspective. We may like to incorporate experiences of others in our book. We have need of short write ups of personal experiences between those dealing with SSA and their with bishops or other leaders of the church.

Our aim is to improve communication, open channels, and to promote world peace.

We would like to ask a specific question. Well, we have many questions to ask. We have way more questions that we have answers. I suppose the good thing is to get people talking. So, lets strike the "world peace' thing and add the "getting people to talk about something" thing.

What have your personal leaders of the church done that have empowered you to live a quality life?

What may have been done to have had a negative influence?

or, How have you felt empowered, or not in the church?

If you wish, you can leave a note here. Or, we would like you to email us your experience to

Power to the people. And to us.


  1. It always seemed that the bishop was caught between a rock and a hard place. He wanted to be sympathetic - at least from what he said to me, but was not able to really help me. He did keep reiterating how this was difficult for him as he was straight - a point he felt he had to make at every appointment we had. It was sometimes hard for me to understand what the church stance from him. My Stake leader seemed to want to didtance himself from me up to and including shaking hands. He was cold and clinical.

  2. I have had various reactions:

    1. My former mission president, an Emeritu GA, told me to act on baing a gay woman in the church, not to tell anyone, and to lie to keep my temple recommend.

    2. My Relief Society president has been nothing but supportive. She has known for a long time that I am gay, yet she is my friend and loves me.

    3. My Bishop has also been nothing but loving and supportive. He loves and supports me.

    4. When I met with my Stake President, he told me that it is impossible for a woman to be gay, that I am not gay, that I should find someone to marry, have sex with him, and live my life.

    5. Another Bishop told me, with great disdain and hatred in his voice, that being "lesbian" (his word, NOT mine- I HATE that word) is "unnatural" and that I needed to get myself into counseling, to receive help.

    6. A LDS social worker told me that science knows more than the Prophet (President Hinckley, when asked by Larry King) about why people are gay, that people are only gay because they choose it and are not born that way.

    So, as you can see, I have had many differing opinions and sentiments regarding the gay thing.

    Best luck to you in the writing of your book.

    I was actually looking forward to the first title you presented... :)

    Happy night!

  3. It's part of the reason I don't believe church leaders are called of god or speak from the spirit or revelation. One bishop or stake president could be totally kind and even accepting of your being gay and your next semester you could have a bishop or stake president that was disgusted by your very existence. Even telling you to do the exact opposite of what you were told mere months ago. If they were truly called of god and listening to the spirit wouldn't you at least expect some consistency?

    I am grateful for a few kind leaders who disregarded what the higher-ups were telling them, and let me know that it was okay to be true to my true self.

  4. I get nervous when people talk about being true to ones self. If a ship is true to its self, and not the stars or maps or some other guidance, it goes exactly nowhere. I do look to leaders for guidance. Lately there hasnt been much. Where is the guidance? It seems that I am having to educate them. "True to ones self" at this point is self defense.

  5. What if one leader tells you do one thing one month and next month another leader tells you to do the opposite? Which do you follow? Both claim they are speaking from the spirit. Disobedience is a sin.

    A ship goes nowhere only if it's docked.

    You shouldn't have to educate someone supposedly called of god on basic human kindness and decency.

  6. I never have a problem with basic kindness or decency with church leaders. They have that down - in my experence. I want to walk out of there with hope. I want hope.