News from the gay married Mormon guy

Here is a headline for you:

“Mormon Tabernacle Choir, LDS Church and Governor Herbert Support WCF’s Hate-a-Palooza”  

What a great headline!  Got me to click onto their sight in a hurry. Salacious headline writing is a talent.

The Deseret News, on the other hand, writes:

“The World Congress of Families will be held in Salt Lake City Oct. 27-30, marking the first time that the international family-focused gathering has taken place in the United States.

Organizers expect around 2,000 scholars, religious leaders, policymakers, world leaders, European royalty and interested members of the public from around the world to gather for the event, which is being heralded as a way to celebrate and strengthen the "natural family."

"Natural family" means children growing up with their biological, married parents, according to Allan C. Carlson, co-founder and international secretary of the World Congress of Families. He said the congress arose from research that showed children do best when they grow up in such families, and that it became, for him, "a moral imperative to advance and promote such households."

Cities from around the world bid for the event, which has previously been held in Prague, Mexico City, Warsaw, Amsterdam, Madrid and Sydney." 

That is a brief description the red side that has me turning a little red myself. However, there is more -- which I generally do not expect from the DN:

On Tuesday, Ralph Becker, Mayor of Salt Lake City, goes and releases a statement saying that while he protects the rights of others to free speech, he believes the World Congress of Families' stated goals "do not reflect the values of the city". 

Good for him, I say -- suddenly not looking all that impartial.

The World Congress of Families claims to be an organization founded on principles taken directly from the Universal Declaration of Human Rights adopted by the United Nations in 1948.  It is a good read, so click on their link. It includes the thought that that adult men and women have the "right to marry and found a family," that parents have rights to choose their children's education, and that "the family is the natural and fundamental group unit of society and is entitled to protection by society and the state".  

I don't think they are making the distinction between  a same sex marriage and an opposite sex marriage, but that all,  both men and women, have the right to marry.

Here is news from the blog of the HRC:

“Today Human Rights Campaign strongly condemned the decision by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Utah Governor Gary Herbert, and the Mormon Tabernacle Choir for their support and possible participation in the upcoming World Congress of Families (WCF) conference in Salt Lake City later this year.

Conference Executive Directer Janice Shaw Crouse announced that the LDS Church will have an official representative attend their three-day gathering this October, and that the Mormon Tabernacle Choir will perform for the conference attendees. Crouse was joined by Pamela Atkinson, an adviser to Utah Governor Gary Herbert, who attended and spoke positively about the group on his behalf.

Deseret News: The gathering is "child-centric and human-rights based” and incorporates ideals of “inclusion, acceptance and equality for all." …The newly formed All Families Coalition intends to counter the group with a message of its own, saying that just because an organization calls itself pro-family doesn't make it so.

HRC Blog: The World Congress of Families is one of the most dangerous groups in America, dedicated to promoting and coordinating the exportation of anti-LGBT bigotry, ideology, and legislation abroad. HRC’s scathing report on the group, Exposed: The World Congress of Families, makes clear that the organization is laser-focused on promoting policies and legislation that puts LGBT people and their families at incredible risk.

Fox News (Fair and Balanced?) While national LGBT rights organizations have blasted the World Congress of Families, Utah-based gay rights groups said they were planning to ignore the October event.

“There is nothing to be gained by protests and angry marches,” said Mark Lawrence, the director of the group Restore Our Humanity. “That gets us nowhere. We’re far more focused on just getting our message out.”

"Restore Our Humanity (which backed the lawsuit that led to same-sex marriage in Utah) joined Equality Utah and other groups to announce the “All Families Coalition,” which hold a counter-event to spotlight those who don’t fall under a “traditional” definition of family — including single parents and same-sex families."

So, there is the news.  I for one am hoping that there is a Mormon with clout that gets invited as the key-note speaker and comes out for supporting families and children of all kinds.  There is not even a change of doctrine involved in promoting loving our neighbors.

Proud of your Boy

As far as anthems go, the song Priesthood Men's grade would be graded about a B. The professor in my songwriting class at BYU would be more harsh. But I appreciate the thought and the effort behind it and its creation even if I am not left humming the tune like a Jerry Herman song. (Anyone around in the 80's, and by around I mean sentient, will know what I am talking about.)  

I am always looking for something that is uplifting to get me through tough times when I am pulled in a different direction.  By that I mean a direction that leads me away from family, service, and doing what we of the priesthood have been taught. I was taught incredibly high standards in my youth.  My heart is set on meeting them. Many times music acts as a reset, and it clears my head of..., well, of garbage. 

I have my songs I sing when I am sad. My favorite sad song is Proud of Your Boy.  It allows me to be sad without letting me wallow for too long.  Both songs serve their purpose.

So much of what I write here is oriented to the Gay Mormon Man part of this blog. I do not write enough on the second part - Men of the Priesthood

Having, holding, and using the priesthood has been huge for me. The knowledge that that I would not be able to function as a priesthood holder has been instrumental in keeping me in line.  The thought that I would not be able to access the power of the priesthood were I to step in another direction -- one different than the way of the Savior -- helps me choose to obey the prophets.

It goes without saying that I face challenges every day, and my outcome is still to be determined by choices that I make. Keeping the Savior in mind, and having a goal to remain worthy to hold the priesthood helps me in a way that is hard to describe. It has been, quite literally, a God send.

Here are links to both the a fore mentioned songs and a bonus.

My Husband is gay. Get used to it.

New from those who brought you Honey Boo Boo and Say Yes to the Dress; An equally heavily edited and in-depth report on MarMoHos -- Married Mormon homosexuals.
  

Get this; Because it is about self confessed homosexuals the show is called "My husband's not gay". 

Of course, the husbands are gay. The husbands being gay is why they created the show. 

And see how clever that title was? See how the presentation is sexy and generates interest?   

After all, "My husband is gay" has been done, and TLC prides itself on being cutting edge. 

Plus they get to be sarcastic and biting and that is just the title -- so it's a win win.

Church spokesman Eric Hawkins responded in the following way regarding the issue:
  

“The decision for a woman and man to marry is deeply personal. While the Church does not promote marriage as a treatment method for same-sex attraction, couples who are trying to be lovingly supportive of each other while being true to their religious convictions deserve our support and respect.”

How is it that freakish things are lauded and supported unless the freakish part is Mormon? I am hoping that the television audience is brighter than TLC's marketing suggests.

Wouldn't it be nice to have others see the show and say, "OK. I may or may not agree with those queer-ish Mormons, but how, where and why they live as they do is their choice.  

Or is understanding and acceptance only required of conservatives or others wearing boring shoes.?

Who would ever have thought I would be typing this thing out.  Read it and remember how it felt

GINGY
We spend out whole lives wishing. We weren't so freakin' strange.
They make us feel that way. But it's they who need to change   (no one has to be made to feel anything -- bytheway)

PAPA BEAR:
The way they think, that is.

[GINGY]
It's time to stop the hiding. It's time to stand up tall.
Sing hey world, I'm different, and here I am splinters and all!
Spliters and all

[MAMA BEAR]
Let your freak flag wave
Let your freak flag fly

[MAMA BEAR]
Never take it down, never take it down
Raise it way up high! Yeah! Let your freak flag fly! Let it fly, fly, fly!

PINOCCHIO:
It's hard to be a puppet

THREE LITTLE PIGS:
Little puppet boy

PINOCCHIO:
So many strings attached.

HUMPTY-DUMPTY:
But it's not the choice you make.
Its just, how you, were hatched!

[ALL]
Let your freak flag wave, let your freak flag fly. Never take it down, Never take it down,
Raise it way up high!
Let your freak flag fly

THREE LITTLE PIGS:
I'm proud to be a pig

PAPA BEAR:
I raise my furry fist

[SHOEMAKERS ELF]
It's time a tell the world
I'm a scientologist!

WICKED WITCH:
I did some time in jail

GARDEN GNOME:
I smell like sauerkraut

WOLF:
I'm gonna shed my house coat

ALL:
Miss Thing, you work it out!
Let your freak flag wave! Let your freak flag fly! Never take it down never take it down.
Raise it way up high!

HUMPTY-DUMPTY:
We've got magic
We've got power
Who are they
To say we're wrong?
All the things that make us special
Are the things that make us strong!

ALL:
What makes us special
Makes us strong!
Let your freak flag wave!
Let your freak flag fly!
Never take it down, never take it down
Raise it way up high!
Let your freak flag fly! Fly!
Fly!
Fly!
Fly!
FLY!!

MarMoHo-Ho-Ho or Gay Mormon, Amen

I am creating a few New Year resolutions today. I am trying to approach new year goals with the serious resolve I reserve for the scriptures, my CD collection and dessert. 

Dessert is a serious subject for those who do not drink, smoke, vote democrat* -- and for those of us mar-mo-hos who don't have sex outside of marriage.

MarMoHo, a term I created to describe my condition;  Married, Mormon Homosexual.  And we are getting a lot of attention these days. Not as much as as Into the Woods or North Korea, but a lot.

Someone e-mailed me a day or two ago with a comment.  "Why is is such a big deal to be gay, Mormon and married.  All you have to do is step out and have sex with any guy you want and then go back home to the wife and clean up."

No.

No, that's not what we do.  We are committed men who commit to a woman, commit to our church and make covenants with the Lord to remain morally clean.  There is no sex on the DL. 

No. Just wanted to clear that up.

Back to New Years Resolutions

A lot of people I know tell me they don't believe in making resolutions for the New Year. They believe that they are just setting themselves up for failure by setting a goal that is un-obtainable, or one they know they aren't going to keep anyway.

First, why bother to set a goal you don't intend to commit to, or one that you don't think you can reach? I always think I can reach these goals. That is my charm and my downfall. If I really am serious about a goal, then dang it, I'm gonna get it done! It's not my ability that is in question.

I believe, due to my exhaustive experience in goal-failing, that success is is really based on attitude. If you, after three days of going without a Diet Coke have a complete and total meltdown and inhale a caffeinated beverage at breakneck speed suffering whiplash in the process, then yes, you screwed up. 

You recommit to the goal or make a new one. You don't just give up. You don't just say screw it, I can never give up caffeine, so why even try.

How about a goal to loose weight. I would love to loose ten pounds this year. Actually I would like to loose ten pounds this week. So I do well for several days and then, Whammo! I eat an entire Marie Calenders chocolate silk pie with pecan crust. Is it over for me? 

No freakin way. I will chase it down with a large caffeinated beverage of my choice and try it again tomorrow!

For some, trying become morally clean is a similar endeavor.  They hoard a pie and then diet for a couple weeks. This is a really funky cycle that has to be broken. 
Those who are serious enough to break the cycle and commit to a marriage are serious.  Don't mess with us. We still face challenges, but we have had huge successes also. Thank God, literally, for successes that keep us in the game.

For those who are thinking of life as a MarMoHo, remember that failure is never final. Make Heavenly Father part of the process, keep a sense of humor and try a little harder. It will be worth it.

And hand me a Diet Coke.



*Sometimes I vote Democrat.  It depends on who's suit and shoes I like better.

My favorite L word

OK, I admit that she has been at the top on my list for a long time now, but I think that she is now, and will be for all time, my favorite Lesbian.

This video actually made me cry like a fat 47 year old baby