Sunday, January 31, 2010

High Heels?

Arguing with my child the other night she sighed her "I just want to hurt someone, and it's gonna be you!" sigh and exclaimed "Can't you please just look at it from my point of view!"

I could. I owed her that. So I tried. And five minutes later she still was upset at me because I wouldn't let the chickens sleep the night in her dollhouse because, as she pointed out, the lightning was very scary that night.

Really, it didn't hurt me to look at her situation from her position on the bed where we sat for a minute as she explained about Antoinette's broke wing, and Goldie's reoccurring nightmares about dogs, lawn mowers & some neighbor boy with big teeth.

It didn't kill me at all. And she feels better about a dad who would at least try to see it from her perspective.

Sometimes we learn a lot by seeing things as others see them. Sometimes not so much. I really didn't learn much from listening to her concerns that night, but I appreciate her more for the tender-hearted soul she is. And frankly, I never would have thought to concern myself with "chickens dreams" on a cloudy night. (sounds like the Mamas & The Papas)

If walking for a mile in the other dudes moccasin's isn't your style, try stilts. Or, try just listening without pushing your own agenda.


  1. I just cant wear heels anymore. They dont go with camo.

  2. My dog ate a few of my neighbors chickens, so he shot her. :( I found out from the tattle tale neighbor next door. I guess I would be angry too if a dog ate my chickens.

  3. A good reminder for me as I spend time talking to state legislators over the next couple of weeks.

  4. Agreed,

    And young children really do drive this point home. I can't tell you how many times, Eric and I have to remind eachother that no matter how logical it seems to us, our reasoning with our 2 and 4 year olds doesn't always fly. They are just at different stages of experience, understanding, interests, and therefore reasoning ability.

    Lifted up to your bigger message, being of the same age doesn't neccessarily transcend this Gap. If you've grown up LDS and have been truly active, you have probably spent an inordinate amount of time contemplating church doctrine, spirituality, and generally things of a "higher" nature. Sometimes it's easy to forget this isn't super common for your average peers. We tend to overlook eachother's lack of intense introspection and development in key areas of interest. Then we tend to devalue others who don't share our reference points. I thank my mission to Japan for cracking a door of insight into a completely different world and reference points. Nothing so humbling as finding out how little you know, when you thought you knew so much. Therefore I've resolved to listen more, and allow what I've experienced and learned to be what it is; specialinzed unique perspective, not concrete knowledge for anyone else. I value it, I share it, I don't give it much weight beyond that. That said, I really love following the loosely connected non-sequiturs of our children. If I were a smarter man, I could map these with some kind of chart or graph that showed how genius they really are, as I suspect is truly the case.

  5. Cute story. You should write for all men.